Ever since the inception of civilization dreaming has fascinated humanity. From Joseph interpreting the King of Egypt’s dreams to modern psychological research, dreaming has always exposed a captivating and mysterious aspect of our minds.
Throughout the years, as most people, I’ve had my share of colorful dreams; in particular one that has occurred since I was a little girl. It is an incomprehensible dream, one that focuses more on sounds and feelings rather than the visual aspect of what happens in it. The emotions tied to this recurring dream have left me drained, confused and really unsettled. In my awake hours I’ve tried to analyze exactly what the dream means or better yet, what message it tries to send me. The fact that it doesn’t have a cohesive visual—not even a comprehensible series of flashes to shed light on what it is about—it makes it much harder to decipher.
After several years the dream recurred about two months ago. As in the past, I woke up feeling upset and anxious, unable to figure out what message it sent. I asked myself “Why now after being gone for so long?” and “What does it say about my childhood, the person I am now, the things I’ve endured?”
I let these thoughts settle in for a few days and that’s when I finally realized that the mystery associated with dreams might not always be so bad. Sometimes we spend an immeasurable amount of time hoping to decipher the darkest, deepest crooks of our minds, but what if they’re meant to remain that way? What if some dreams are prophetic and insightful while others are simply a way to flush out the negativity associated with the events taking place in our lives? Indeed, I believe that each dream does have a purpose, even if it’s simply to let something go. I now realize that this dream, which touches on someone very close in my life with whom I’ve had a very shaky relationship, is meant to send me this message: Heal. Heal and let go.
It is as easy as that….yet as equally complicated. I keep trying to uproot the twisted branches that wind around the need to find a resolution; still the message is much more subtle than that and possibly more powerful. I’ve noticed that over the years, as I matured and entered different stages of my life, the dream has also given me a different outlook. What once disconcerted me the most has shown me a way to forgive; the uneasy feeling that accompanied the dream asked me to be kinder, to myself and to the person I’ve come to associate it with. Again, the subtle voice that once beckoned me to find a meaning to the dream, now asks me to heal, to allow myself the courage and permission to let go. And that’s it. It took thirty-one and waking up with knots in my stomach to finally face the truth. It wasn’t a prophetic message, a sign to find closure in a bizarre relationship, or something that urged me to find peace anywhere, other than my own heart.
I haven’t had the dream for a couple of months now. Perhaps its purpose has been served, the observant spirit whispering having succeeded in its message. Or maybe it’ll return, enlightening me with more subtle messages until my soul realizes what it needs to truly heal.
Published for Mind Key on 10/16/2015